Friday, September 4, 2009

Nekron: Evil is a Popped Collar...

Karate Kid (comics)Image via Wikipedia
Now If you're a Legion fan, I bet you are wondering why I ahve a picture of a Karate Kid (no not that one, the first one) up with a bunch of pictures of Nekron Lord of the Unliving. Believe me the answer is out there.

So if teaser preview ads are to be believed, Nekron is going to be Blackest Night's big villain. But how evil is the Lord of the Unliving? We we really don't know. All we know is that he wants to bring death to the entire universe.  But let's consider the villainous features of this character. What makes Nekron a universal adversary?

There are certain physical traits we can tell about him that ooze with evil: baldness, sickly pallor, and skeletal features. Some of the great villains of our time have been bald. Lex Luthor, the Iron Sheik, Ziggy--all bald. Death is always a skeleton and that always means bad. And we pretty much know that if you look like you have any form of skin disease you have to be evil of some sort. Oh and don't forget those evil red eyes.

Red eyes have been a sign of evil ever since the invention of the white bunny rabbit. Just see the movie Night of the Lepus to see how evil rabbits can be. Damned scary I tell you. You know what else has red eyes? Gingerbread men. Never trust those bastards.

But what really makes Nekron evil? It isn't any of these features. I am pretty certain there have been lots of good bald, skeletal, jaundiced heroes. What makes him evil is that popped collar. A popped collar in any situation will always scream  DOUCHE BAG! Not only will Nekron re-animate your dead girlfriend, he will more than likely try to slip something into her drink. Why? Because he is both Lord of the Un-living and a douche bag.

So the question remains, where has Nekron been over the past few years. Well he has appeared randomly in a few comics. Kyle Rayner once fought him, Captain Atom faced him, and even Witchfire met wits with this epic douche. My bet is that Nekron has been lurking in the DC Universe in plain sight wearing a white baseball cap gold embroidered lettering on it. 

In fact, I think I know how all of this ties into Countdown! Remember the Morticoccus? Well, Val Armor, the Karate Kid (no not that one, the first one) died carrying a viscious disease. Well given that he is from the future, he really isn't supposed to die in the past because well, that is just damned weird.  And given that all the dead heroes have "risen" as of late, and KK's body hasn't...well...Just look at the two pictures above and think about the collars. 

Tell me I am not missing something.
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