Thursday, November 12, 2009

November Idleness Continuing...

Upward and they like to say. Though, I have never quite figure out who they actually were.

I decided that I should try to come up with a list of information that I should pass down as tried and true wisdom for future generations. I like to think of it as part Thus Spake Zarathustra, part Grocery List, part road map to the future. Confusing? Well, think of it like a million points of light, but less pointy and considerably more illuminated. Let's call it in the Dozenish Aura of Illumitations.

Here is the list thus far:

  • Don't shave when your angry.
  • Connie Chung is not a real form of martial arts.
  • Its always fine to cry into your coffee, but if you cry into your tea...then you're just a pussy.
  • When in Turkey try a Turkish Bath.
  • When trying to impress a date with your record collection, don't play the Chariots of Fire Soundtrack.
  • Say something absurd twice a day, or four times to a person who just won't get it any way.
  • Implant an ABBA song in someone's head just to be evil.
  • Ponder religious queries: How many pins can you stick into the head of a dancing angel?
  • Wash, rinse, retreat.

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