Friday, October 7, 2011

The Miracle of America Means More Montana Manequins

The Miracle of America is not only having the opportunity to ride bombs and think about American history. It is a chance to walk through that history with life-life representations of the miraculous individuals that make America and Montana, well, Miraculous.

Take, for instance, Annie, this aptly named mannequin, who has subjected herself to the tortures of electronic hair enhancement for the sake of beauty.

Or this nameless soldier, with a chiseled face, who likes to have things pinned to him such as medals, ribbons, and 3x5 notecards showing his service to his country.

And we can never forget the glamorous flapper mannequins of the 1920s, those who brought us the love of jazz, interracial sex, and bootlegging. It is a little known fact that all mannequins made during the 1920s were actually vessels for contraband alcohol. This the real reason why most mannequins are hollow today. Back in the 20-30s, each mannequin would have a cork at the bottom allowing bootleggers to pour in whatever type of home made concoction they wanted. If you have ever wondered why you don't see mannequins that date before the 1930s, it was because the FBI sent men out to smash most of these whenever they were found, thus ruining one of the best ways to conceal liquor in the era of prohibition.

And of course, no walk-thru museum is complete without a mannequin with an inexplicable shit eating grin. 

Yep, unbeknownst to you, this mannequin has actually been taking up skirt pictures of your daughters while you weren't looking. And that is another Miracle of America--the mannequins are so life-like they do creepy things when you don't know it.
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