Putting the Fun in Fundamentalism…or is it Putting the Mental into Fundamentalism…I get confused sometimes.

Sup everyone…Y'all know who I am so I don't need to introduce myself. Everyone seems to have these ideas of the things I like to do. So I figured I would tell it to you straight. These are the things I like to do in my day-to-day life. 

Sometimes, I like to drink from my crunk cup.

Sometimes I like to kick it with pimps and hoes.

Sometimes I like to, well…I have no idea what is going on here…

Sometimes, I just end up hanging with my homies...

Keep it real. YOLO. 

***Wonderful World of Clutter author's note: Yes this is the third religious themed post in a row…While this is a holy trinity of sorts, I hope it doesn't happen again.

Rocks of Ages

Nothing amuses me more than roadside attractions. Religious themed roadside attractions become an added bonus for me as they seem to rarer and rarer finds.

On the road south to Red Lodge, Montana, is a decaying spot called Pathway Thru the Bible. This walk through rock garden is reminiscent of the Petersen Rock Garden outside of Bend, Oregon, but with none of the grandeur and much more proselytizing.

One would actually miss Pathway if they didn't have a keen eye trained to the road. Trees practically cover the hand-painted sign indicating that some stop even exists here. Nothing really states much about who built it or why. Well, why they built it is pretty obvious…teach about the bible…through walking through ambiguously organized rocks. But it still remains mysterious. 

As I strolled through the grounds, a woman with a weedwhacker hacked down grasses off in the distance on the property. While normally I would stop and converse with the property owners of such establishments, I figured I would take pictures and let this woman manicure her property as I wandered around without being acknowledged.

It is hard to tell whether this rock garden really saw better days or not. It didn't have the aura of outsider art or the craftsmanship of a planned tourist attraction. If anything, it felt like a forced Sunday school project--something kids were subjected to build begrudgingly when egg crates and cotton ball mangers weren't enough.

I wonder though…Where did the abalone shells come from in Montana?

And of all of the scenes to depict here for a walk through of the bible, was it really necessary to have Lot's Wife as a Pillar of Salt depicted? It seems like some more inspirational things could have been presented. Perhaps it was just a the best use of the medium at hand.

Mail Order Prayer...

A page later, in the same magazine, you can also mail away for a catalog for lingerie...

Now that is what I call the true power of prayer...

Juding a Book by Its Cover...

Christian religious texts are always funny entities. Where they are the didactic tomes of Protestant philosophers, or the interpretations of scripture by quasi-scholars, there is an air of importance to these texts and a tendency for really bad titles.

Neurotics in the Church is a fine example of one of those books that is quite possibly a rational analysis of Protestant behavior within the confines of the religion. However, basically states, "People who go to church are crazy." Nuff said. 

So what is this book exactly about? Religious fanatics or Catholic guilt? Protestant work ethic or fringe holy rollers? Hard to say...But let's look at the book design. It's a little hard to make out, but the book cover features a variation on the classic Rorschach test. It is not a true ink blot test, but known well enough in popular culture to be show a psychological element of the analysis to the text.

A little searching about the book revealed that the author was a Presbyterian minister who tried to combine new techniques in psychology and theology to work with unruly church-goers..

Funny how that works. 

Godly...

If there is something to be learned form this pamphlet, Peace vs. Chaos, by Rev. Billy Graham, it is that only GOD himself could make that man's hair look this damned good in this image.

I think the pomade taming his mane consists of angel sweat, the blood of unconverted pagans, tallow, and honey.

But I could be wrong. 

Buddha is Super Happy!

Even though it's well beyond Chirstmas now...and it has been quite some time since my trip to Chicago, I thought this was somewhat appropriate to post today.

Jesus is born! And Buddha is raising the roof. So there. Happy early Epiphany everyone.

Speaking Out...Now Please Shut Up...

While right-wing christian evangelism might seem like a new phenomenon, it has in fact been present for decades. They didn't have the mega-churches they have today. 

I find it funny to think that they relied on the same tactics of leaflets and pamphlets of the Leftist intellectuals and agitators. A few minor changes and this particular pamphlet by Billy James Hargis could pass for an issue of Cometbus. However, the rhetoric would not match up.

So as I head off to a more conservative portion of the country, I have to remember, that I need to keep my smart-ass mouth shut. I could get my butt whooped...For chirst.

Waiting For Superman...Wait Not that One...

For today's post, I want to share some interesting pamphlets I found during a late season garage sale.

So for this cold day in December, let's remember what the holiday season is really about...Christian Propoganda.

While children in need of better education standards are waiting for their own Superman, early Christian propagandists/pamphlateers put out desperate cries for their own Superman. I think that they were waiting for Jesus, but who knows. Kind of like waiting for Godot or Guffman, Jesus never seems to be as timely as people seem to want.

But who really needs waiting when you could have "ACTUAL EXPERIENCES." These experiences for young Christian pamphlateers can include the experiences such as highway evangelism, hitch-hiking, and church. Sometimes you can't make these things up, they are just so wonderfully absurdist in their own right. And of course they show their age; no god-fearing contemporary evangelical would venture off of a hitch-hiking trek across town let alone via highway. 

Of course if this is too much for you, target the teen-ager. So Teen-Agers, well, you get the point. Kind of like a sharp stick in a un-lidded eye. Of course, contrary to the cover art, there will be no hand-holding with the opposite sex.