Santa Claus is Coming to Town: You Ready to Be Judged?

Last year I decided that I had it up to the back of my throat with traditional Christmas music. Unfortunately contemporary Christmas music was not much better. The treacle we end up being forced to listen to over the period of time from the end of November to Xmas day is enough to give diabetes to sugar plum fairies and to curdle egg nog.

So why not find a suitable replacement that brings cheer and the aggression that truly represents the modern day holiday spirit?

The Judgement Night Soundtrack was the most suitable replacement for caroling Chipmunks asking for hula hoops, people whining about "Last Christmas," and people wondering about Santa Claus checking any kind of list.

The movie, to be honest, sucked. I saw it in the theater. Seriously, don't bother to watch it. But the soundtrack is great. So great I have written about it previously on The Wonderful World of Clutter. If you need a run down about the film, it includes something about watching a drug deal gone bad, Cuba Gooding, Jr. not being a parody of himself, and an Emilio Esteves we thought would still have a prosperous career. And that is about it.

More importantly the soundtrack is awesome, so Awesome that I encourage you to buy, download, find, poach, or dub off a cassette the whole thing because it is just damned fun. You can listen to Cypress Hill and Sonic Youth play together.  Onyx and Biohazard do something resembling music. House of Pain and Helmet rap about the movie Taxi Driver in what is probably one of the most comical mixing of lyrics ever. And then there is Ice T and Slayer doing a duet together covering a medley of songs by the Subhumans.

So, in closing, this really have nothing to do with Christmas. But it is still better than any former Beatle creating a Christmas song. And you know that the Boo-Yaa T.R.I.B.E would eat Chipmunks for breakfast.

Ah the 90s...Crack and and the Damage Done

I remember when the following video by The Dogs came out almost two decades ago. My schoolmates and I would skip around in circles chanting, "Yo Mamma's on Crack Rock..."


This however does not rank as a meowable song. Instead it falls into the realm archaic public awareness songs. There were others, like "No Coke" by Dr. Alban. This too lack's any meowability. Basically singing about crack is about as much fun as singing about meth, but but with teeth intact.


Anyway, for your viewing pleasure....

Ah the 90s...

Remember the 90s? If you don't, it was that brief period of time when people outside of the Northwest started wearing flannels because it was suddenly fashionable.

During this era, a particularly dark period of time in comic, we had a dead Superman, a Batman with a broken back, a Green Lantern on a ego driven power trip, Wonder Woman doing nothing too important but losing her role in the pantheon of super heroes, and Flash, once again, running off an "dying" trying to stop a "crisis."

What we were left with was a Superboy with a terrible haircut and a leather jacket, but a semi-decent choice in music.  Of course you may recognize two of the three bands names but what was that other band? Could it be?

Local trivia time, Karl Kessel, the creator of the new Superboy, hailed from Portland so it seems fitting that he would name-drop one of Portland's great bands.  and The Spinanes were one of the great Portland bands of the nineties. Perhaps he saw them at Satyricon or La Luna during that golden era.

Of course it doesn't really matter, music is music, but one must ask, why is Superboy only interested in purchasing girl fronted rock bands. Not too many men listened to Liz Phair back in the day. And, well, to this day, most people who listened to Hole are laughed at. But why not ask for an album with Pond or Hazel, or, hell, even the Dandy Warhols?